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girl on girl: end the madness

travel + culture

on the road and what's out there.

 

girl on girl: end the madness

Caitlin Surakitbanharn

this post is a plea to womankind.  the women of all ages, sizes, races, ethnic backgrounds, education levels, etc.  honestly, i can't take the madness anymore and it is time we talk about it.  

girl on girl. or maybe girl vs. girl.  this has to end. not the porn kind....the kind where women are just MEAN to each other.  for no reason other than....well, there is no reason to be mean to another woman.  and honestly i just can't anymore with this bullshit, you guys.

girls being mean to each other is not chic, not even when Serena and Blair do it.

girls being mean to each other is not chic, not even when Serena and Blair do it.

we've all done it at some point in our lives, i'm sure.  i've done it too.   hopefully it's unintentional.  but probably it was a mean or catty comment to another woman or about another woman and we justify it as...it needed to be said.  she needed to hear it.  but really, what it was is just a blaring, glaring insecurity....that somehow the woman we are projecting our anger on is succeeding somewhere in life that we aren't.  and it makes us feel bad about ourselves.  so we think...i'll cut her down...bring this bitch back down to earth.  it sounds so nasty when i put it like that, doesn't it?  it is nasty.

i've noticed it more and more as i've gotten older (and deepened my Buddhism practice...where i have learned that everyone has their own path and we must accept that as their happiness, not our own.  we must be happy with our own path.  thanks thailand!).  we just cannot let each other live!  

so what if the girl in your office wears heels every day?  that's her thing.  so what if she wears crop tops to run...she likes it.  WHO CARES if she gets up every morning to exercise?  just because you do not doesn't make her action wrong!  nor does it make your own action wrong... it's a personal choices and lifestyles.  if it makes you feel bad about yourself because someone in your office dresses up everyday and you don't... don't be mean to her or make a snide comment.  either leave her alone and let her wear her skirts and accept it...or start wearing some skirts of your own.   (which...by the way, these are all things that other women have criticized me for (either to my face or to other people who have then told me about it) in the last six months alone.   these are true stories.).

if you don't like Kim Kardashian's magazine cover with her booty on display...don't buy it...AND don't cut her down for doing her thing.   i am ALWAYS reminded of her famous tweet when i hear this bullshit from other girls about myself and about others....like CAN I LIVE?!  CAN WE ALL JUST LIVE?  

we are all in different places in our lives...and we're all on different paths.  and we have to accept that what other women are doing might not be for us at this point in life.  and if it's something we wish we had or wish we were doing...well...there's no time like the present, yes?  use it as inspiration and make something happen.  

cutting other women down does not make you a bigger person.  gossiping about other girls while hanging out with your "girlfriends" isn't fun..it's awful.  and don't think for one second that the minute your back is turned...they aren't gossiping and being mean about YOU.  how AWFUL.  aiyeah. 

we are all part of this complex gender...and being a woman is hard enough as it is.  we have some many different obstacles and barriers to maneuver through life with.. we need to SUPPORT each other and LIFT EACH OTHER UP.  i'm tired of other women just being another road block.  ladies, we have to do better.  

so with this, i've decided to make a new feature on Stilettos on Sullivan.  inspirational women.  i want to profile amazing, badass women that i know or have come across or admire in my life.  and i want to share their successes, triumphs, advice and outlooks on life.  because i want to promote, support and empower incredible women. it's what i believe in.  and i hope it inspires all of the women who read this to stop being competitive with other women...and start lifting each other up.  celebrate our differences instead of making fun of them or being mean about them.  see each other as opportunities to learn instead of as the enemy.  

the first one is coming soon.  i hope you guys enjoy it.